Afternoon everyone! Hope you’re all having a wonderful weekend …
Here is part 2 of MAHARISHI PHUCKNUCKEL’S GUIDE TO ZEN: (part 1 can be found here)
Thanks to Sir G for this =)
- If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
- When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.
- Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
- The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
- The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
- The sooner you fall behind, the more time you’ll have to catch up.
- Change is inevitable … except from vending machines.
- A fool and his money are soon partying.
- Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
- I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Borrow money from pessimists – they don’t expect it back.
- I was sad because I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. So I said, “Got any shoes you’re not using?”
- Seven percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.