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I’m incredibly lucky

I relish my daily sessions in the Think Tank (aka my bath) – it’s just about the only time of the day that I get to spend 30 uninterrupted minutes inside my own head …

One of the things I think about nearly every morning in the Think Tank, before my mind wanders of to Who Knows Where, is how insanely fortunate I am. Today, this realization took hold of me completely and reminded me just how much I have to be thankful for. Because I do – I’m incredibly lucky and I have a very, very good life.

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  1. I live in my own house in a pretty decent neighbourhood in one of the most beautiful cities in the world. I may not own a mansion and it may not be in my dream location by the sea, but it’s mine. I have a roof over my head and a space to call my own.
  2. I have two gorgeous children that I’m completely in love with. It’s a privilege to be their mom, to share an indescribable bond with them and help them grow up into great men.
  3. I have garden. Ok, that may not sound like a big deal to some people but to me it is. I lived in an apartment for a couple of years and nearly died of claustrophobia. I couldn’t handle not having an outside area to retreat to. I have that now, complete with a braai, patio furniture, swimming pool and deck chairs. Awesome.
  4. I own my own business. Me. I have no investors to please, no debt and no partners to check in with. I am completely free to work my own hours and do only things that I want to do. That’s ridiculous! How did I land up with this honour?
  5. I have the most exceptional team of people working with me. Each and every one of them is an outstanding asset to my company. They’re very special people – I’ve never seen such spirit, enthusiasm, hunger and drive from a work force before.
  6. I have absolutely everything I could possibly want – a wardrobe full of clothes, hundreds of books to read, endless fantastic music to listen to, plenty of food to eat, loads of entertaining gadgets … there honestly isn’t anything I feel deprived of. Wow.
  7. I have Sir G in my life. He accepts me absolutely, warts and all. He never judges me and never tries to change me or fix me. Sir G has been on a rollercoaster with me over the years and he stuck around when I really didn’t deserve that kind of loyalty.
  8. I have 6 crazy animals who keep me company every day. At times when I’ve been black with loneliness, their loving presence has helped to pull me out of my funk. My 2 beautiful Burmese cats and 4 pavement special canines are always here for me.
  9. I have both my parents and I have brilliant relationships with both of them. It hasn’t always been this way – my Dad raised me and I only met my Mom when I was 16 – but now I’m so grateful for the loving connection I have with each of them.
  10. I have peace in my heart. Finally. After so many years of anguish and pain I am now, on the whole, perfectly content and happy. I am comfortable with who I am, interested in my life again and pleased with the path I’m taking.

That’s a LOT to be grateful for, don’t you agree?

This exercise in thinking about how lucky I am is so good for me. It totally grounds me – all the stupid, petty things that can suck me into a hole of misery are quickly banished from my thinking when I focus on all the good things in my life.

Even though …

StevenMcD’s comment just now reminded me that I do have some good stuff to focus on:

  • Even though my roof leaks, I am grateful to have one over my head
  • Even though there is sometimes not enough hot water for me in the mornings, I am grateful to have both hot and cold running water
  • Even though half the lights in my house don’t work and the plugs keep tripping, I am grateful to have electricity
  • Even though my garden looks like a war zone right now, I am grateful to have my little patch of green to hang out in
  • Even though I wear the evidence of pregnancy and birth on my skin, I am grateful that I was able to carry and give birth to 2 beautiful baby boys
  • Even though they sometimes drive me up the pole, I am grateful to be “Mom” to these very special children who let me love them completely
  • Even though my marriage ended up on the rocks, I am grateful for the times that it was good
  • Even though I have a very unhealthy relationship with food at the moment, I am grateful that I have enough to eat and that I can feed my children
  • Even though I am not happy with the weight and shape of my body, I am grateful that it is (relatively) healthy and that I have full use of all its parts
  • Even though I have more work than I can handle, I am grateful that I can earn a decent living and pay my staff each month
  • Even though I constantly feel the pressure of running my own business from my home, I am grateful that I work for myself and not anyone else
  • Even though my animals cost a lot to keep and shit all over the place,  I am grateful for their loyal company
  • Even though I only met her when I was 16, I am grateful that my Mom is now part of my life and that she always has my back when I need it
  • Even though I miss my Dad terribly now that he lives so far away, I am grateful that he is able to live as he wants to and is never more than a phone call away
  • Even though I don’t know where I’m going or how things will work out, I am grateful to have a future
  • Even though I go through some rough shit, I am grateful that I can always pick myself up again