I know you’ve been here with me more than once over the last year and absolutely bugger all came of it. I KNOW. So don’t you DARE roll your eyes at me, mmk?

You know what I realized this morning? I have not weighed this much since my last child was born, nearly 16 years ago. Holy Frigging Moly! That’s just disgusting …

I’m feeling like an absolute WHALE these days and quite frankly, I’m sick of it – sick of not fitting into my clothes, sick of having to disguise the blubber, sick of feeling ugly, sick of being grim about all this.

Sick. Sick. Sick!

So … I decided yesterday that *that* was my last day of eating crap.

I AM going to lose these extra 10kg! Sheesh … ten bloody kilograms. That’s completely horrendous!

To kick it off, I’m doing the water, fruit and veg thing only for this week. That’s it – no processed carbs, no meat, no cool drink and no alcohol. I’d say no dairy, but I have milk in my coffee and tea and I’m going throw some feta into my salads. Protein? I’m getting that from whey powder, which I’ll mix into my breakfast shakes and lunchtime green smoothies.

And hells, I’m going to have to overcome my exercise allergy. Buggeration.

Mmk, grumble over. I’m doing this! Feck.

Today is the start of my new nutrition and training programme.

Ok, ok, I *know* you’ve heard this before and yes, I have had a few false starts over the last few months but this weekend was the turning point for me. On Saturday morning I broke down in tears over how much weight I’ve put on – 12 kgs in the last year (I shit you not), which is a LOT on a 163cm frame! I bawled about how I can’t fit into any of my clothes anymore, sobbed about feeling like crap all the time and slumped to a new all time low about how awful I look.

ENOUGH!

Today. THIS day, things change.

What makes it different this time? Well, apart from hitting complete rock bottom, I have enlisted some help. I have asked Sir G to get involved and give me a hand. I’ve tried a few times by myself and failed miserably. I don’t want to fail again. I want to, want to, want to damn well succeed this time and if that means I have to have someone else watching, pushing, encouraging, policing and tracking my progress, then so be it! I can’t do *everything* by myself, I have decided (obviously), so I swallowed my pride and asked Sir G to assist. Mmk, he’s not really a pushy person at all and I *do* need rather a strong hand at times, so we’ll see how it goes. But he’s been training again for about a month now and he’s already packed on about 3kgs of muscle and can I just say … PHWOAR!!!!

There’s no way I’m going to tell you what I weigh now, or what my measurements are – I’m just far too embarrassed! But, all in all, I’m optimistic about my transformation. I feel different already – my mind is in the right place and I committed to spending the next 6 months getting in the best shape I possibly can. I really owe it to myself.

Of course, the hardest part for me is going to be the night time snacking – that is my weak spot! Aaargh … to NOT lie in bed and nibble on crap is going to be sooooo difficult. But, I’m just going to have to suck it up and give the Cookie Monster the finger. I’m not going even one more DAY feeling miserable about this stupid bloody weight story.

I want to feel good about myself again;

I want more energy;

I want to fit into my clothes;

And, DAMMIT, I want to look good out of them too

Secondly, it’s a scorcher … I LURVE hot weather like this

Thirdly, I’ve just taken my measurements … WOOHOO!!!

Despite last night’s little cheat session of beer, pizza and ice cream, I’m over the moon about my results!

It’s been about 3 weeks since I decided to knuckle down and do something about my weight and flab and I have now lost 2kgs and about 2cm all over. Check it out:

START -> NOW
Weight: 64kg -> 62kg
Waist (above belly button): 72cm ->70cm
Waist (below belly button): 86cm -> 81cm
Hips: 99cm -> 97cm
Thigh: 56cm -> 54cm
Upper arm: 30cm -> 28cm
Chest: 90cm -> 93cm (but who’s complaining? Not Sir G, THAT’S for sure LOL!)

So … normally with each kg and each cm lost, I lose 0.5% bodyfat. I reckon that puts me at about 26% now.

YAYNESS!!!

I’m really chuffed with these results because I haven’t exactly been 100% disciplined with my nutrition and training. Sure, I could have done better by now if I’d eaten perfectly and trained every day but I’ve allowed myself to have treats and cheat meals and I’ve had days where I didn’t get to the gym at all. However, what I HAVE done is follow a routine that I think is completely sustainable and THAT suits me just fine.

And guess what? I’m wearing a pair of shorts I couldn’t fit into a month ago!

WHAT a good feeling

Remember this?

It’s SO going to happen WAH!

Mmk, I got the expected bad news about my body fat from my trainer last night. Meh.

Actually, I was pretty accurate in my estimate – I thought it would be between 26% and 30% and it turns out that I’m currently at 27%.

Shit. That’s just AWFUL!!

So yeah, I now know that I have to drop 7% to hit 20%, which is acceptable to me but that’s a tough ask and realistically, it’s going to take me longer than 3 months. Ideally, I would like to get to 18% but that’s a 9% drop in total and at my age (37) that’s going to require a MAMMOTH effort (and probably the rest of the year to achieve).

You can check out BF% guidelines here.

I say “guidelines” because different sources will tell you different things. My goals are set at what *I* know to be true for me. Don’t forget that I’ve done this before and, with the help and approval of my doctor, I cut my BF down to athletic status only a couple of years ago. Please DO NOT attempt to start ANY training or nutrition or training without FIRST consulting your doctor. And seriously, if you want to get your BF down to the athletic range, you must ensure you educate yourself on the possible health implications, mmk?

Although I was expecting this bad news, I was still slightly mortified at the reality and felt like crap. So what did I do? Hah! I ate … sheesh, what a RETARD! And the reason is completely inexplicable. Seriously, I have no fucking clue why I’m obsessed with stuffing my face when the sun goes down and I’m all alone.

Soooooooo … to combat that tonight here’s what I’m doing: I’m not training during the day today. Instead, I’m timing my meals so that I can do a hectic cardio session at about 7pm this evening here at home. Then I’m going to bath and do the dinner thing. I’m *hoping* that after training and feeling all “bok” with myself for doing it, I won’t be in the frame of mind that sets me off on a binge.

Plus, as backup, I have the Body of Work DVD to watch. It’s all about the very first Body for LIFE Challenge that Bill Phillips orgainsed. Man, it’s inspiring!!! You just wanna go out and pump some iron after watching that hehehe

What say you? Think that’ll work?

And to give me even MORE incentive to stick to my nutrition plan, I’m going to share my starting measurements and my mid-term goals with you. YIKES!!!

• Weight:  64kg (goal: 54kg)
• Chest: 90cm (this will probably go up a bit)
• Waist: 72cm (sies! Want to get that back down to 64cm)
• Hips: 99cm (I’ll be happy with around 88cm I think)
• Upper arm: 30cm (25cm is my target)
• Thigh: 56cm (where’s the jumbo? I could kick start it for you!)
• Body Fat: 27% (goal: 20%)

BTW, I first shared my measurements with you 2 September 2008, so if you go back to that post, you can see how I’ve, erm, grown since then).

That’s it! That’s where I’m at … not for long though

I got this dress many, many years ago, back in my “fat days” and now I’ve had to haul it out my cupboard again *sob*. At least it covers me up though, which is just what I need after the bad news I received from the scale at gym yesterday *wail*. Hrmpf!

Yessiree, it’s even WORSE that I thought. Feck, I’m actually distraught … I thought I may have lost a few grams since I started gym again, but noooooo! Yours truly has put on even MORE weight! WTF?

So it’s official. I now have 10kgs to lose. Crap, that’s going to be hard work, but I’m not one to run from a challenge so I’m now going ALL IN to win this battle.

I’ll be training 5 days a week from tomorrow, giving myself Sundays off to rest. I’m currently going 3 times a week, but I need to do more cardio – at least 30 minutes on the treadmill and/or the bike on the extra days.

Urgh … I hate cardio.

I’m also so going to kill this binge eating nonsense!

Between my PA and my PT and me, we’re putting together a nutrition strategy and sticking to it like a fly on shit. I’m allowing myself to be a right spoiled brat hehe … PT draws up plan, PA executes plan, I just eat waha! I likey likey

Take THAT Cookie Monster *shows the finger*.

I’m eating 5 x per day now, just enough to fuel my body, keep my blood sugar stable and my metabolism ticking over nicely. No more, no less. The evenings are going to be damn difficult though!!!

So there! Enough bitching about it. (I’m sure by now you’re tired of me droning on about this hey?)

Time for action!!

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QUICK UPDATE @ 8pm

I have eaten almost PERFECTLY today … WOOHOO!!!

Breakfast: Protein drink

Morning snack: small apple and some grapes

Lunch: smoked chicken salad (minimal french dressing)

Afternoon snack: low GI bread, low fat ham, cucumber, reduced fat hummus

Dinner: grilled fish, carrots and peas (seasoned with fresh lemon juice)

NOW, I just need to hold out for a couple of hours till I crash and then I’m a WINNER

CAN SHE DO IT??!!!

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‘NOTHER UPDATE 16 JAN @ 10.50am

I did well people!! Just a handful of grapes at about 9.30pm

*pats self on the back*