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It’s our 20 year school reunion on Saturday.

Farking hell … already!? Sheesh … now there’s a kak thought right there!

Mmk, I’m crapping myself just a bit – I haven’t really kept in touch with anyone from “back in the day” and it’s going to be VERY weird to see everyone again.

And possibly rather uncomfortable.

X: So, what did you study when you left school?

Me: Um, nothing …

X: Oh (loser) Well, I did medicine and went on to become Professor of Some-Unpronouncable-Faculty at Such-and-Such University.

Y: Do you have children?

Me: Oh, yes! I have 2 beautiful boys πŸ˜€

Y: How lovely! How old are they?

Me: 17 and 14.

Y: Goodness! You started young, didn’t you? (slut)

Me: I guess so; I was 20 when I had my first.

Y: Mine are 6 and 3 and they are just so gorgeous! I love being a full time Mom. Of course, its tricky juggling all the spa treatments, Pilates classes and tennis lessons with family life, but my live-in Nanny is SUCH a help!

Me: I find it hard to balance work and family life.

Z: What is it you that do?

Me: I’m a web designer.

Z: Oh, how nice for you (yawn). Where are your offices?

Me: I work from home.

Z: Aaah, I see. (so, you obviously can’t be very good/successful then)

Y: Oh look at that! There’s my husband playing catch with our kids (my life is so perfect)

X: And where is YOUR husband?

Me: I’m divorced. I’m here with my boyfriend. Meet Sir G.

Y: *gasp* (he looks a bit YOUNG!)

Z: I’m getting married next year, to a stinking rich property developer in New York. Actually, I have to jet back there on Monday for my final dress fitting with Vera Wang.

Me: Congratulations! I hope you’re both very happy … Well, it’s been swell ladies; hopefully we can stay in touch in the future?

X + Y + Z: Oh yes daaarling … we simply MUST do that! Cheerio love!

(OMG! How can she wear those shoes with that outfit? It looks like she hasn’t had a manicure since like forever! And I’m SURE those tits are fake)

Meh. Meh. Meh.

Cynical? Only a little bit …

It’s probably going to be nothing like this. I hope.